I’ll be honest- I wasn’t exactly the loyal, devoted girlfriend in my younger days.
And to be fair about things- those were flings (no sex; just playing around with no emotional attachment). I didn’t really put in much effort into making them work.
It’s not like I’m some sadist who goes around collecting my jar of hearts; I was just so much younger, dumber and lets face it… I’m pretty screwed up. Not even going to try denying that.
If you ask me right now; I don’t really remember the exact number of flings I had in the past.
Heck, I don’t even remember some of their names.
What I do remember is some of the really bullcrap breakup routines I played.
Some of them are just so shitty that I just look back at my old self and go…
I know some of you are totally going to judge me, but oh bah.
1. “Your house & school are really far away, it isn’t convenient at all for us to be steads.”
Okay, but seriously- HOW FAR CAN IT BE? It’s not like we can even be in different states!
Singapore is a small island. But apparently having to travel more than 30 minutes to meet him was simply too much of a pain for me.
2. “I’m an IJ girl, you’re from some neighbourhood school. We’re not a good match.”
Yea, I totally had that dumb mindset about things back then. It was some status thing.
When people asked which school your boy came from, you liked to flaunt off some prestigious boys’ school name.
Definitely not proud of this one…
3. “My friend thinks you’re cute, so it’ll be betraying her to continue being your girlfriend.”
The truth about this one is- I didn’t really like the guy and that wasn’t true. No one told me he was cute.
I just… didn’t want to continue being his girlfriend.
Now looking back at this, I can’t even…
HOW did I even come up with that kind of logic?
4. “Our schools uniforms don’t look good together.”
So therefore I didn’t want to be seen with him.
Wow, how superficial was this.
5. “You’re not good at taking neoprints.”
I don’t know if anyone remembers… but back then it was quite a popular thing.
I simply loved taking it with my friends & if my boyfriend sucked at taking nice ones, I didn’t like him already.
6. “We’ve been together for over 3 months, time’s up!”
At that time, it seemed like a long-term relationship to me already.
The average fling I had lasted about 2-4 weeks tops. So once it got too long, I just wanted to move onto the next one even if things were going perfectly fine…
7. “I just don’t see a future in our relationship.”
Oh please. LOL. That’s a total oxymoron of #6 routine.
I wasn’t even interested in keeping things going over a quarter of a year… WHAT FUTURE??
Times have changed… And now I’m with a guy who literally makes me stay & work things out with him.
All my dumbass excuses don’t count, he doesn’t take any of my stupid reasons- he just knows one thing… He wants to make it work with me.
And looking at how I was, it’s a pretty good thing Mark is so damn determined and won’t stand for any of this shit. LOL.
I kinda regret all the stupid things I did and wish that I could apologise for the hurt I caused those guys… I remember times when the guy would really cry & I would be all, “Oh god, are you done? Lets just move on, okay?”
Call it karma.
Now my heart is stuck onto a very special someone that I cannot shrug off no matter how hard I try. He probably has poison on those fingertips of his; because I just keep coming back for more no matter how hard I try to run.